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Last Half

Comedian in a field – Charley McMullen

​We came up with this idea to have really great interviews with people in unique locations. The first comedian Charley McMullen in a field. 



PULP | Kara Mason

PULP | Kara Mason

We seat ourselves on these wind-scoured and semi-desert shrublands with an alleged multitalented actor, comedian, and co-founder of the Southern Colorado comic collective, Steel City Stand-Up. The man calls himself Charley McMullen, but a birth certificate is not presented. Our idea is to chauffeur this man into the wilderness and press him with questions while Kara “The Muscle” Mason takes photographs. This way—if for fear alone– he will answer our queries about Steel City Stand-Up, the role of humor, and Mariah Carey honestly and without pretense. After all, we are his only way out.

We eye the man in malefic silence; the only detectable sound being the lonely winds tossing about our hair and the psychotic cha-chink of Kara’s camera shutter opening and closing like the terminal strokes of a countdown. A single bead of sweat betrays Charley’s calm exterior with an apparently growing dread. Noticing this, Kara’s one eye meets mine from behind her camera with a cold and steely glare… it’s go time. 

PULP: Okay, we’re going to open up with more of a demand then a question. 

Charley McMullen: Sure.

PULP: The Death Penalty… GO!

CM: Oddly enough, I am for the death penalty. I’m really liberal about most things, but… I have limited faith in the possibility of rehabilitation.


CM: You like to start off light.

The question served a twofold purpose. One: to test the man’s improvisational reflexes while under duress. Two: To keep him wondering what could possibly come next. Since he just provided us with an earnest answer, we know he has no idea what to expect. We quickly move on with the interrogation. 

PULP: What is Steel City Stand-Up? 

CM: Steel City Stand-Up is something that John Brown and I started very informally about a year and a half ago, but recently we’ve started to treat it like a business… giving all of the management resources that musicians have to comedians.

Kara looks over as if to say, “he’s telling the truth.” I regard her assessment with a quick uptick of the chin. We decide to move along with quickfire questioning until we sense something is off.

PULP: Let’s say you’ve been asked to come up with a manifesto for Steel City Stand-Up on the spot. Your answer would be binding and would also be printed thousands of times in newsprint. What would you say?

CM: Jokes Without Ego… because they [print shops and engravers] charge by the letter. 

PULP: What do you think is the overall role of comedy in our lives? 

CM: I think comedy is one of the most important things in life because the more [intimidating] and terrifying that life gets… the more necessary comedy is. Whenever you take comedy out of the equation everything gets unbalanced and that’s when you get people who just wake up one day and… run a plane into the World Trade Center. 

PULP: Thinking of comedy as a tool… what purpose does it serve? 

CM: You can’t have peace without starting with laughter. I think comedy is an important component in the quest for peace. 

PULP: If you were to be charged with creating the ideal comedy club in Southern Colorado, what would this place be like? 

 CM: [It would have] low ceilings, a built-in sound system, big frightening bouncers, and a zero-tolerance policy on heckling. 

PULP: What would you call it?

CM: I’d call it the Jack Passante Jr. Theatre. 

PULP: How come? 

CM: Because he was one of my best friends and he died way too early… I think it would be a good way to honor him. 

PULP: What kind of comedian do you consider yourself? 

CM: Well, if I were a pretentious asshole, I would consider myself intellectual. I sort of consider myself abstract.

PULP: How can you make comedy abstract? 

CM: It’s comedy that doesn’t really have a stance and it doesn’t pick a side and it’s really more about how the audience hears it than being about a certain thing… You have relationship humor… racial humor, but abstract humor is just about opening the mind of the audience. 

PULP: What is the best joke you have that nobody ever gets? 

CM: Funny thing about NASCAR fans is they like races but they don’t like other races. That one did not go over at Sports Garden. 

PULP: CLICHÉ! I am going to hit you with one: “a picture is worth a thousand words.” What picture do you wish existed purely for your own comedic fodder?

CM: Children performing surgery at a Children’s Hospital. 

Feeling satisfied with the intelligence we have received thus far, a sudden urgency is felt to strike with our two most vital questions (code-named “The Deuce,” or “Alpha,” and “Omega”). Like quickly changing winds, the mood instantly shifts; Charlie instinctively assumes the full-lotus position in his chair, Kara’s camera clacks with rising fever, and I draw in a pregnant breath. Behold… this is the litmus paper. 

PULP: Now, we have heard of a mastery you might possess over the game: “The Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon.” Tell us of Kevin Bacon’s relations with… Mariah Carey. 

Mariah Carey’s name echoes across the semi-desert expanse in resounding bellows… sending shivers through the Rocky Mountain range as if it is the shuddering spine of Atlas. 

CM: Alright, let me see here. Mariah Carey was in “Wise Girls” with Mira Sorvino, who was in “Romy and Michele’s High School Reunion” with Janeane Garofalo, who was in “Mystery Men” with Ben Stiller, who was in “There’s Something About Mary” with Matt Dillon, who was in “Wild Things”… with Kevin Bacon. 

Riddle answered, Kara stumbles in a drunk-looking attempt not to faint; I try to conceal the dark area spreading on the lap of my pants. Certainly, this man is the chosen one. I ask one final question.

PULP: Charley McMullen, what are the essential elements of a good comedian? 

CM: I guess just tenacity. Don’t let bombing slow you down, get stage-time anywhere you can, and don’t have it be about money. If it is about money, you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. Which is easy to say because I’m broke.

by Kevin Healey

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Last Half

Rock Art of the Purgatoire Canyon





Despite the permanency the name implies, rock art has an unexpectedly ephemeral nature. It doesn’t announce itself but creeps up on you, appearing in places you’d least expect like the footprints of someone who’s passed before you. It is this very transitory nature of rock art that makes it both fascinating and extremely difficult to understand. Because of the large and unique collection of petroglyphs and rock structures in Southern Colorado, archaeologists in our area may one day be able to shed a little light on the meaning of rock art images all over the world.

The Picket Wire, or Purgatoire, Canyon area just south of Lamar has a large and well-preserved concentration of rock art that archaeologist Lawrence Loendorf of the University of New Mexico predicts will “be the key to understanding North American rock art.” The Purgatoire River running through the canyon is one of many tributaries that make up the Lower Arkansas River Valley, an area which extends through the southeastern corner of Colorado and into the Oklahoma Panhandle and Northwest Texas. This area has the highest concentration of rock art in North America and a cultural history going back tens of thousands of years.

Walking into the Purgatoire Canyon is like walking back in time. The canyon is huge—wide enough to be seen from space—and blanketed with long, savannah-like grasses, intersected by tall cottonwoods and tamarisk that line the river. On either side, the valley walls rise up and branch off into smaller canyons that remain largely unexplored. The canyon walls themselves are dotted with junipers and basalt boulders that run all the way down to the river bed like toys scattered in a child’s playroom. Considering that less than a century and a half ago the canyon had the humid, fertile environment of a rain forest, it’s not difficult to imagine the attraction of the oasis-like valley to settlers throughout history, from the Folsom Man to Spanish colonists.

And the rock art is everywhere: pieces chipped off from boulders litter the trail, and every rock seems to have some sort of petroglyph, although not in the most obvious places one would look.

Something that becomes immediately apparent when searching for rock art is how much seeing it depends on luck and subjectivity, even when the area is rich in petroglyphs. As Loendorf put it in his study of the Purgatoire Canyon, A Manual for Rock Art Documentation,

“ … in practice it can be very difficult to decide if marks on a rock are the result of a tree limb blowing against the surface or the product of a human artist. It can be equally difficult to decide if a series of marks is purposeful, not fortuitous.” He also points out that finding rock art can depend largely on such changeable conditions as lighting and recent rains.

Loendorf has been studying the Piñon Canyon Maneuver Site, or PCMS, since 1989 and is the world’s foremost expert on petroglyphs in Southern Colorado. The PCMS itself is not part of the Purgatoire Canyon, but borders the northeast side of it.

According to Loendorf there are three major types of rock art in the area: biographic, which are incised scenes of warfare similar to ledger drawings and buffalo skin paintings; visionary and shamanistic images like handprints, which are the most common images in the PCMS; and what Loendorf refers to as “doodles,” or very abstract shapes such as squiggly lines and spirals.

These types of petroglyphs are not unique to Colorado. Handprint petroglyphs can be found all over the world; and when seen in conjunction with human figures they are believed to be a sign that the art is shamanistic in purpose, as if the print is capturing the artist’s soul. Spirals or concentric circles are also a worldwide phenomenon. In the Southwest they are often associated with shields, but are sometimes also connected to astronomy.

That being said, there are certain types of rock art that can only be found in the Purgatoire Canyon and PCMS site. These petroglyphs are anthropomorphs or quadruped figures who face the viewer and have knobby knees and digitate hands. They were created by the mysterious Apishapa (also spelled Apishipa) Culture, a group unique to Southern Colorado who inhabited the Lower Arkansas River Valley between 2,000 and 500 years ago. They’re mostly known for building rock structures like the “Stonehenge” type ruins found in the Apishapa State Wildlife Area, about 20 miles east of Walsenburg. But there are also examples of their rock structures in the PCMS and Purgatoire Canyon.

Unlike other inhabitants of North America during this time period (between about 1050 and 1450 AD), who were developing a more sedentary lifestyle, the Apishapas remained semi-nomadic even though they were building permanent stone structures. These structures were probably used for visionary and shamanistic purposes, not as homes or shelters, and some sites have material dating from the Paleoindian and Archaic periods, suggesting the sites themselves might have been in use up to 10,000 years ago, around the time when the “Folsom Man” lived in nearby Folsom, New Mexico. No matter how long the stone structures were in use, though, one can infer from the continuity of the Purgatoire Style of rock art and archaeological evidence that there was a continuous culture existing in Southern Colorado up until about 500 years ago, when a sudden break in the style of rock art coincided with the disappearance of the Apishapas and the arrival of Plains tribes like the Apache.

No one knows what caused this break in cultures, but Loendorf speculates it was a combination of drought and the arrival of Europeans, which brought the availability of new tools such as horses and the uprising of a warrior culture. Unlike the Apishapas, the Apache (one of the first recognizable tribes to inhabit the area) liked to decorate their sacred caves with the images of their deities, as well as use caves in conjunction with cattail pollen to induce visions, which so far has not been found in the rock shelters of the PCMS. They also favored biographic images in their rock art, which is very rare in the Purgatoire Canyon. Instead, rock shelter-rich areas such as the one around the Dolores Mission and Cemetery have petroglyphs pecked or painted onto boulders outside of the rock shelters, never inside. According to Loendorf, the boulders were crude stone altars used by Apishapa shamans who drew figures “on the ground near them” to represent tribal deities.

No discussion of rock art in Southern Colorado would be complete without mentioning the work of the late William McGlone and Phil Leonard. Although not professional archaeologists, anthropologists, or art historians, they have probably done more research into the petroglyphs and stone structures of Southeastern Colorado and the Oklahoma Panhandle than anyone else in modern times. While their exploration and records are valuable, their contribution to the study of these petroglyphs is somewhat marred by their belief that the petroglyphs created by the Apishapa are actually Ogam, a form of writing developed by Irish monks sometime in the fourth century AD. They claim that reading Ogam inscriptions have led them to discover several archaeoastronomical sites, including Crack Cave in Picture Canyon and the Sun Temple, also in Southeastern Colorado. They also believe that some petroglyphs are a form of Northern Arabic writing.

The idea that petroglyphs are “saying something” is hardly surprising; as Loendorf puts it, “Art is not unlike language; when one element is placed on the wall, it plays a role in the next element.” However, aside from the presence of these supposed Ogam writings, there is no evidence of Western occupation in the Americas prior to the Vikings around 1000 AD, and then only in Newfoundland. Without proof of a Western presence, the theories of McGlone, Leonard, and others like them can only be interpreted as racist. By taking Native American inscriptions and monuments and labeling them as Ogam, Mithras, Anubis, Northern Semitic, Egyptian hieroglyphic, Apollo, and so on, they are essentially taking the history of Native Americans, erasing it, and replacing it with Western history!

Their claims would be too ridiculous to even warrant discussion if they weren’t regarded with so much credulity and if this practice wasn’t so wide spread in regards to Native American rock art. In 1994, for example, the discovery of Chauvet Cave, an Upper Paleolithic site in France with “wondrous” multicolored paintings, was featured in every major American newspaper. That same year, the Kaibab Paiute finished a study of cave paintings in the Grand Canyon which depicted the Ghost Dance and other images every bit as impressive as those in Chauvet Cave. Instead of mainstream media press coverage, however, they were featured in Weekly World News under the headline, “4,000-year-old UFO Found in Grand Canyon!” Even if these sensational claims are the only way to generate interest in rock art in North America, any attempt to remove American Indians from Native American rock art should be met with outrage.

Petroglyphs hardly need UFOs and secret histories to be interesting. Rock art is mysterious, and beautiful, and exciting, and for scholars trying to study it, occasionally frustrating. But possibly that is what it’s meant to be. One doesn’t have to understand or give a single meaning to everything one sees in order to appreciate it. Petroglyphs are artworks that are living and magical in a way that paintings in environmentally-controlled museums can’t match. While it is doubtful the petroglyphs and rock structures in Southeastern Colorado will ever be more comprehensively studied unless attitudes toward rock art change, the fact remains that the Purgatoire Canyon and the Lower Arkansas River Valley as a whole contains a wealth of history just waiting to be explored and admired.

by Tasha Brandstatter


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Last Half

Ice Blocking



With the stress of several fires, all dry desert heat, and rainless days, I know I’m looking for unique ways to stay cool and calm.

Since it’s not ideal to travel three hours to the sand dunes so you can spend a day scooting down sandy hills on plastic sleds like you’re Matthew McConaughey in Sahara, I have a different method for you all. Instead, you can get a little wet, and certainly wild, with a slide down and cool down toward the end of a hot day. With what you ask? What else could you possible do to cool down besides sprinklers in your back yard, waterpark, or swimming pool? Ice Blocking of course, don’t worry I’ll tell you what the heck it is. Here’s what you do. First, this simple fun can be easily devised using two items:

-One 10 pound block of ice (can be found at King Soopers)

-And One kitchen towel to keep your tush somewhat dry (don’t be afraid to accessorize)

Second, find yourself a steep and grassy knoll (dirt does not work and you will hurt yourself), University Park in Pueblo is always a good choice, but any steep hill will do. Next, place your towel over your block of ice, situate yourself as comfortably on your ice as you can, have your friends give you a little push and… Geronimo! You’ll slide down that hill faster than a fireman down a pole.

Continue to maximize your ice blocking experience in three ways. First, go on a hot day so your ice melts making you slide faster. Second, wait for the grass to get greener. As the ice melts, your block sleds down the green grass better. And third, find out if your desired hill space has a sprinkler system. If it does, find out when they kick on and go ice blocking then. Slickery is always better, in this case. Combine those three things and you’ll see what I mean. And why not dress down? You don’t get wet from ice blocking unless you go through the sprinklers. So get in those board shorts and bikinis and slip and slide over the hill and down a slippery slope of water.

It’s too much of a scorching inferno during the day, so try going ice blocking at night when the sun disappears and the evening feels a lot cooler. With this inexpensive outlet in the sizzling summertime, who needs Waterworld anyway? Actually, that does sound nice right now… but anyway. Give this poor man’s slip and slide a chance and it could create a summer memory between you and some great friends.

For a quick bit of fun on a budget, this is a great activity to let you get down while things continue to heat up.

by Kelly Branyik

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Last Half

Art Coup in Cañon



Through the lightly Juniper specked cliffs cupping the slight winding roads, you can take a slow drive past the quiet residences of small towns that don’t make it on the map.

Through the lightly Juniper specked cliffs cupping the slight winding roads, you can take a slow drive past the quiet residences of small towns that don’t make it on the map. Drive a little further, you might find yourself cruising upstream to the rushing Arkansas River. You may even see a lonely rafter eager for some white water or an angler hungry for brown trout. Art is neither a rare spectacle. You can walk down main street and spot several art studios full of a life’s work, or you can see an artist diligently completing his oil painting halfway outside of his studio door. For some, not much is really happening in Canon City for the art community but recently the Fremont Center for the Arts scored a major coup by showing an internationally-known artist’s creations.

Thomas ‘The Painter of Light’ Kinkade’s, artwork made its appearance at the Fremont Center for the Arts in Canon City. Thomas Kinkade is the American artist known for his realistic and impressionistic paintings using three elements of light: water, sunlight, and artificial light. His purpose in painting was to simply paint with his heart. Although he never searched for fame in his work, he is the most sold artist in the country and became so reputable that his art is easily spotted in St. Jude Hospitals, The White House and even the Vatican. 

Garden of Prayer by Thomas Kinkade | Courtesy Fremont Center for the Arts

Garden of Prayer by Thomas Kinkade | Courtesy Fremont Center for the Arts

The FCA is a non-profit organization home to the local artists of Fremont County but also host to collections and exhibits of art ranging from Day of the Dead exhibits to the Splendor of Glass exhibits to Artist of the Tattooist. The FCA’s establishment is known to the art community, but to outsiders it merely appears to be an extension of the public library across the street. To discover that Kinkade is in Canon City is a stunning piece of news, so with all this excitement, many are left wondering, how does artwork of this caliber make its way to a small town?

Art centers are struggling and it doesn’t matter that Canon City has the oldest Arts Community Council west of the Mississippi. The FCA’s Visual Committee has been working for two years to bring Kinkade’s original artwork to Canon. It all started in March 2011 when Linda Bella brainstormed ways to get more big name artists associated with the FCA. With the help of Linda Carlson, Bella settled on attempting to contact Thomas Kinkade. The Lindas searched diligently for his contact information, eventually finding it on Google.

Once they made contact with Kinkade, they proposed he show his art in Canon City. Kinkade’s response was a hearty chuckle and a “we only do shows in big cities.” Carlson’s logic was that big name art shows are less popular in big cities because the competition is too fierce, but in a smaller city, there will be a larger turnout of appreciative fans. Kinkade found reason in the proposition and March 2013 became the date for display. But the process took an abrupt halt when Thomas Kinkade passed away unexpectedly in April 2012, inevitably cutting off any correspondence with any and every person associated with Kinkade. “We almost didn’t get it,” said Carlson. For months, the Lindas had nearly given up on getting Kinkade to Canon until October when contact was resumed and the plans to showcase Kinkade continued. 

The FCA paid $300 for shipping each original painting from California to Denver. The display consisted of both original paintings and giclee of prints like The Wailing Wall, Disney’s 50th Anniversary sketch, his Fenway Park painting, Walk of Faith, and many others. 

I asked Carlson what the FCA hoped to gain out of bringing a world famous artist to Canon City. They hoped to increase interest, awareness, and support for the FCA, regardless of an artist’s prestigious reputation. During the one month display, the FCA sold $3,700 worth of prints, while the Denver Kinkade dealers anticipated only $200 profit. Between the splendidly detailed paintings and Patrick Kinkade’s heartfelt presentation of the hysterical and historical timeline of Thomas, the Kinkade display at the FCA turned out to be a great success for Canon City. So, who’s next for the FCA? The Visual Committee set July 2014 as the tentative date to showcase a Norman Rockwell display for two months.

by Kelly Branyik

 Cover photo The Fremont Center for the Arts   

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